Author: Sage Francis





We walk as two, but we'll leave one set of tortured footprints/

Now here she comes...walking through the door...giving that look. Since/

I roll with shook wimps...I'm shaking in my boots/

Kids are behind me eating steak and soup, talking 'bout beatbreaks and loops/

And I wanna' turn around...join in on the convo, but I ain't got jack to say/

And it's sad to say...I'm just a poetry fag actin' gay in my black beret/

I just came to this wack-ass caf? /

To drink an ice coffee and kill a bit of time before the matinee/

Why oh why did I need Cappaccino Cooler?/

Now I'm trying to avoid eye contact. Lets see if I can fool her/

I put a look of concentration on my face as I scribble on a napkin/

Squinting my eyes, acting like I'm really serious about this mess of non-sensical pen action/

A web of chicken scratch and ink blots/

Is she still there? Standing awkwardly glaring? I think not/

Look up....think again. Shit...now when/

Is she going stop making me waste ink from my pen as I sit and pretend/

I knew I should have come with a friend. I shrink and I send/

Myself into meditation...and I'm on the brink of Zen/

Is she buying it? I pick up my empty glass...tilt it..and drink the flem/

She's STILL scoping! in fact, this chick's a 10/

At least in my book...which isn't all that well read, but it's been said /

Once she gets her grip on men they simply bend/...backwards.

She attracts nerds, jocks, substitutes and student teachers /

Who all profess their love for all of her protruding features/

There's no fooling this creature, she's WAY fine/

So dope, I'd have to smuggle her across state lines or else pay fines/

What's holding me back is what I heard through the grape vine/

She's a non-conformist freak who only comes out in the daytime/



"Don't look at me." I can feel the burn of her stare on my sensitive skin/

I'm anti-social and I don't know how conversational sentences begin/

Plus, I'm allergic to the medicine of sexual healing/

This impotence is sickening. She's sensual...appealing/

NowI'm covering up my crotch region by crossing my legs/

Lost in thoughts of whores in my bed. It's awful...so I'm forcing my head/

into my forearms. I should...invite her for a cup of Joe/

It would do more harm than good...I just know/



I mean...she's no Natalie Portman, and I've been kind of holding out for her/

Naturally...Now my thoughts spin...and she's on the "out" for sure/

Gradually...contort my mindframe so no doubts occur/

I activate testicular bravery and I shout to her/



Our eyes lock.

And time stops.../



She floats over to my spot...

and I say "Hi, I'm not/



trying to hit on you like the way all these other guys jock/

I just wanna' let you know...I'm the type of person who lies a lot/



Sometimes I fart and I pick my nose like a maniac/

I'd be glad to front the cost of a date with you as long as you pay me back/

If we ever reach the friendship level where things like that are shared/

And I know my facial hair is weird...but I've been waiting for someone like you to shave my beard/



I'm usually more discreet about my insecurities, but today...I just ain't prepared."/

In all honesty...this dame just stared/

And I was like "Uhhh...yeah.../

So ummm...heh..."

Nervous twitches were initiated and out nostrils flared/

Our eyes started wandering and I was rocking in my chair/



I just continued on scared that I lost her...in my upfront approach/

She looked at my napkin and noticed what I wrote/

...which was nothing

I said "The funny thing is...I could have used you as a muse/

Wrote you sonnets in iambic pentameter and then produced/

Mass amounts of unsent love letters and out-of-tune love ballads/

Some valid...but most just to get you thinking of marriage/

It's untrue. I don't want to create a first impression I can't live up to/

I...just...wanna...



She said "Nuff said. I'm a theme park. Ride me until the sun sets."/

So I jumped up on her shoulders as we exited the entrance.